The Kids are All Right (2010)

By Devon Gilbert

The Kids are All Right is a well-made movie about marriage.  In a lot of ways it is a basic movie about the subject.  For example, one partner doesn’t have enough time for the other because of work and one partner is having a fling with somebody else, just like any movie about marriage.  In this movie, the couple going through the normal trials of marriage is Nic (Annette Bening) and Jules (Julianne Moore).  Both Nic and Jules used the same donor’s sperm to get pregnant, so they have raised two children together.  Though they are a lesbian couple, they don’t seem much different than any other marriage.  Their kids, Laser (Josh Hutcherson) and Joni (Mia Wasikowska), seem to also view their parents as perfectly normal too.  However, Laser is interested in meeting his donor father, Paul (Mark Ruffalo), so he gets Joni to set up a meeting since she is now 18 and can request one.

Right off the bat I will say the premise is very routed in real human emotions.  It’s very understandable that no matter how much the kids love their moms, they would be curious about their sort of father.  It’s also understandable that Paul might really take to the kids and feel sort of like their father, because technically I guess he is.  Finally, it’s understandable that Nic and Jules will feel threatened by this because it could potentially disrupt their family unit.  And let’s face it; the premise for this movie is only going to become a more common one in America as time goes on.  It is nice to see a comedy that has its head grounded in reality, though this movie’s more like a dramedy.  There are some funny parts and parts that just make you smile, but ultimately the movie gears more toward drama.  Though to be fair, the movie is never sad and it’s certainly not heavy.

In some ways I wish the movie had gone for more of a comedy vibe or gone the opposite route and gotten more serious with the material.  There are some humorous situations and funny lines but mainly the movie focuses on how Paul’s presence is breaking down Jules’s family, though mostly because Jules sleeps with him.  Without this being a straight comedy I would have expected some serious issues to be addressed.  For instance, I mentioned before that the kids were all right with their parents being lesbians (and indeed the title of the movie acknowledges this) but you’re telling me they don’t get teased at school for it?  And honestly, Laser wouldn’t ever get mad and say something about them being lesbians?  I doubt it.  The movie should have dealt with that but my biggest gripe is how director Lisa Cholodenko treats Paul.

Paul seems like nothing but a nice guy and a positive father figure in the lives of Laser and Joni.  Many scenes of the movie even show the positive aspects of having a father figure for the children, like how he lets Joni live a little by riding on back of his motorcycle or how he plays basketball with Laser.  Yet in the end the movie treats him almost like a villain, essentially saying Nic and Jules family was perfect before he came around.  I found that outrageous, especially since the worst (and really only) bad thing he did was have sexual relations with Jules.  The sex was totally mutual and instigated by Jules (who is the one betraying a spouse and so is obviously the more guilty one), yet in the end the kids and Nic are madder at Paul.  That felt a little off and I would have at least liked an explanation.  And did Nic and Joni really never discuss how having a father figure seemed to be a good thing for the kids, or were they too selfish?  Or could the movie not handle the discussion without ending the movie with the message it wanted to end with.

Ultimately I think The Kids are All Right is a good movie, but no masterpiece.  The acting by Bening, Moore, and Ruffalo is excellent.  The dialogue and pace work well too.  And as a movie about marriage and its hardships, it’s also a winner.  The movie is light, the characters likeable, and there is room for thought afterward.  I just wish the movie had tackled its subject with a little more honesty.  Clearly the point of this movie was to show that two lesbians could raise a family just as well as any heterosexual couple, thru good times and bad.  That point would be stronger had they not ignored the idea of fathers in the lives of children, especially since this movie seems to show that it is good to have a father figure only to ignore that fact because it didn’t fit into writer/director Lisa Cholodenko’s PC message that lesbians can raise a family too.

The Kids Are All Right:  B