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By Collin, on February 28th, 2011

Barney’s Version – A film discussion.
Barney’s Version is a rare movie. First off, it is really long. It is a drama, comedy, has thriller elements, and doesn’t really have a conclusion…per se. Most importantly, it is a character movie about a character who is a bad person. He hustles TV tax loops as a career, is an asshole, and torments the women he loves.
It only succeeds because it has the best acting I’ve seen in a long time. Sure, Colin Firth was great in The King’s Speech, but it kinda’ asked for a great performance. There is something different to me about an Oscar-bait performance and an average-Joe performance. I’ll elaborate on that in a second.
Paul Giamatatti is Barney who experiences tragedy while living a wafey life in Europe and decides to take a job offered to him in Montreal where he makes a shitty soap opera. Is making shitty entertainment silly? Not at all. Producing the show only to make money, then hating the shitty entertainment you produce - that is silly .
His father is played by Dustin Hoffman in one of the most enjoyable performances I’ve seen from him. The whole movie kind of works like that. It adds up to very little, but is just kinda’ cool to watch. We see Barney jump from wife to wife, regret his mistakes, and punish women with seemingly unlimited patience.
In many ways, Barney is a realization of our social desires, but with a lack of self awareness. But in a way, Barney may have self awareness, he just doesn’t give a fuck.
Take Barney’s wife’s friend Blair. He is a vegan and talks LOADS of shit about eating meat. Sure, I love animals a lot and hate cruel forms of animal husbandry, but these people make my blood boil. Most of us have met someone like Blair in real life, but politely agree with his nonsense out of curtousy to him or our friends.
Barney is just rude to him and this effects his friendships and, most of all, his relationship with his wife. The movie takes a long time to get anywhere, but that kind of begs the question: Where does it go?
The movie is kind of about a murder case that surrounded Barney when he was younger and whether or not he killed his best friend. We find out what happens, but I’m not satisfied that is the point of the film. It is a McGuffin of sorts – a plot point that serves a purpose and doesn’t really impact the overall story.
You can flame me about a how the film is just a slow and analytical look at a man’s life and the controversy surrounding an accidental death, but then why the disease segment of the film? Just to add continuity between the movie and the novel? The novel contained an unreliable narrative due to Barney’s disease and asterisks from his son that correct factual mistakes. I don’t see much of that here. It seems the movie suffered from the fact that it would be so hard to do a 100% accurate interpretation and be able to find an audience.
What the movie does do right is uncanny though. What it does is actually makes me fucking care about the characters. Barney reveals something to his wife Merriam toward the end of the film that feels more tragic than most death scenes I see in average movies. The moment is so genuine that people in the theater were teary eyed. Why? I assume because it was so believable it struck similar moments in their lives and maybe made them think what it would be like to them.
Now, the Colin Firth thing: This might just be me, but when I see an extraordinary actor playing an extraordinary person, while amazing, isn’t that same as Paul Giamatti as Barney. Its like Mickey Rourke as Ram – there’s just something to extraordinary actors being able to just inside a loser’s mind and body and exude that persona.
Again, flame on, but thats just how I feel. I still think Colin Firth’s performance is legendary, but still PG takes it to the house.
Barney’s Version is not a great movie, but comes as close as you can to being one. There just something missing…
Collin says B+/5
By Collin, on February 22nd, 2011
Amazon.com providing a pretty cool streaming service
Everyone who reads my articles knows that I’m not shy about my love affair of Netflix streaming. Being able to watch what I want, when I want, is incredible.
However, Amazon has thrown a little monkey wrench into the mix. In order to reward their premiere members, or inspire new members to sign up, they have provided a huge amount of titles for streaming.
They claim that, “You can instantly stream the movies and TV shows on you PC, Mac or any of nearly 200 models of Internet connected TVS, Blu-ray players and set-top boxes.
It all sounds pretty fucking sweet for only $80 bucks.
Cool.
Regardless of that, it seems like a pretty easy decision.
-Collin
By Collin, on February 22nd, 2011
#22 We just watched this on Netflix streaming.You should too!: The Secret in Their Eyes
The Film: The Secret in Their Eyes
Movies with this kind of patience don’t get made anymore. It seemed to be a movie made by a Argentinian film industry screaming to be noticed. By the way, the Argentinian president is SO hot. She’s a dime. She looks like a former Brazilian Playboy bunny or something. It is FUCKING crazy. Like, we think we’re the progressive, forward-thinking country and they’re the ones with a really hot president. Anyway, that has nothing to do with the movie – but she did pose with the filmmakers after they won the first Oscar for their country.
Moreover, the film follows a retired government official Benjamin as he’s trying to write a novel about a past case that haunts him. The story is told in the past as well as future and we gleam important events as the movie progresses. To be frank, digging into the past makes shit go down.
Why to watch it: It has one of the best action scenes ever made
The common complaint with this movie is that, for the most part, it is slow. Things do take a while to get going. However, out of where comes the scene everybody probably talks about. It is so crazy that I actually leaned over in the movie theater and said, “How the fuck did they do that?”
The chase sequence at the soccer game is top five chases of all time. It does what I love in an action sequence : It infrequently cuts and lets camera technique and characters garner the intensity of the scene. This is the way it should be done. Christopher Nolan and Zach Snyder are famous for this.
Pay attention to this: Camera technique
There is a language to film. There is no doubt about that. I mean, people can flame me all day about it, but that is just the truth. The technique used by Juan José Campanella is impeccable. I’m rarely in awe of a director’s mastery, (except whenever I watch a Kurosawa or Kurbrick movie) but this guy is a fucking cock star. His use of close-ups and depth-of-focus masterful. Also, his use of special effects for aesthetic and framing sake reminds me of Orson Welles. I was disappointed that White Ribbon didn’t win for Best Foreign film because I do think its a more “important” film…if that makes sense? You should check that one out too. Make it a double feature.
-Collin.
By Collin, on February 21st, 2011
#21 We just watched this on Netflix streaming.You should too!: Centurion
The Film: Centurion
Neil Marshall is a name movies lovers should know. Okay, so he’s not a Tarantino or Scorsese, those are names your Mom would probably know. Marshall is the real deal though. He makes cultish, genre movies that are homages to other great cult movies. I’m not talking great movies like The Godfather or Pulp Fiction, I’m talking Road Warrior, Escape from New York, Aliens, Star Trek movies, and other cool shit.
His film The Descent is his most celebrated, but as I revisit his other movies, I’m starting to see that all his movies are pretty damn good in their own way. Sure, The Descent delivered great horror flick for the mainstream, but Doomsday, in all its madness, is equally as good to me. The dancing scene remains pretty high up there for me as weirdest, therefore greatest, of all time. Don’t forget Big Trouble in Little China (a masterpiece) was dismissed in its day, only to be celebrated later.
The plot of Centurion is simple. A bunch of Roman soldiers get ambushed, a few survive, and they try to survive on their way home.
Why to watch it: It is just fun to watch
Okay, so this movie is pretty dumb at parts. Like them going all the way to save the General, just to leave him, and not accomplish anything more. Kind of pointless. Also, going all that way just to start a romance movie three-quarters of the way in. The romance felt contrived, as if the producer was reading the script and was like “Woah! Where is the love story?!”.
However, the gore, the sword-and-sandal genre, the fighter scenes, all came together to make a really fucking entertaining movie. As Neil Marshall mentioned himself, if the movie was never meant to be historically accurate. Why should it be? It is a story based around a legend. Unless you’re watching this movie with the leading expert on Ancient Roman military history, than I think you can overlook some of the misgivings. It never really takes itself seriously, so you should take it the way same way.
Pay attention to this: The gore
Not that you could miss it, but the level of gore in this movie is admirable. I really don’t like the horror genre overall, so a lot of people get the impression that I hate gore. Not true. I love gore – the more the merrier with me. I even think gore can make a bad movie better. Think the new Wolfman flick. My beef comes when horror movies try to lean on the “creative kill” concept, which is really boring to me.
With the exception of a few Rob Zombie kills, some Saw stuff, and Troma, the concept is pretty unwatchable to me. That doesn’t mean you should feel the same way. Also, when gore is used just enough to get an R-rating. Totally fucking lame.
But Centurian delivers – big time. It shamelessly has heads flying in all directions, doesn’t cut away from limbs being cut away, and straight up uses digital blood spraying unapologetically.
Call me a weirdo, but I was pretty damn impressed with this movie. Sure, its plot looks like it was scribbled on a napkin during lunch after history class in high school.
-Collin.
By Collin, on February 21st, 2011
Unknown movie discussion

Okay, let’s talk about movie titles. You’ve worked on a screenplay and a movie for more than a year and all you can come up with is Unknown? It gives lame bloggers a lot of room for puns though, I cringe at these titles in my head.
So Unknown was pretty cool… but it could have been the best thriller of the year.
If someone went back and cleaned up a bunch of the plot holes and the length shortened, this could be a great movie. It follows playing Dr. Martin Harris who receives brain trauma from a car accident while on business trip with his wife. He wakes up to find that everyone doesn’t believe he is Harris and even his wife claims he doesn’t exist.
The rest of the story is a labrynth of cool plots points that seem to be aiming toward making the movie a bit too long. I’d point out these weird mistakes, but that would ruin the fun.
There are a lot of close-ups and camera angles that are a bit too “there” for a person who is looking for them. Obviously the director assumed he’d be dealing with an audience who didn’t really want to think much about what was going on.
He was probably right.
Actually, I will mention one part because I’m only saying what people can already see in the trailer: Why does Harris go talk to the cab driver, walk away, and then return to her in a different scene with not much more accomplished? Obviously if she was the only one who placed you and your wife together, wouldn’t you refuse to leave her presence until she proved your case?
Regardless of my protests, the movie’s action is pretty damn good. They have some of the best set pieces I’ve seen in years. One such instance is where Harris is flying down the road in a car while the killer is driving along side him. He can’t pull into the other lane because he’d die in traffic. He can’t pull into the correct lane because the killer is blocking his path, a path which is blocked by an oncoming train. The scene is given time for tension to build.
It is almost Spielbergesque. He was the best at adding element on top of element to build tension in an action scene. Remember the T-Rex on the car in J-park? First the Dinosaur came, then it flipped the car, then, out of nowhere, a cliff is there for them to fall off of, which wasn’t there in the first place. It just magically appears. (Look if you don’t believe me, Spielberg admitted he just adds stuff and doesn’t expect the audience to notice.) Or, when Indiana is fighting on top of the tank which is on a dooms-day path off the edge of a cliff. You’ve got the tank, the people trying to kill him, then the edge of the cliff.
Also, theres a great scene where Harris is gettin’ his punch on with a bad dude and tackles his through a wall to the couple next door who just had sex.
There is also a scene where some guy comes in and explains the whole story to the main character, but really it is just exposition for story sake. Why not just write the story a bit better and let the audience decide?
All-in-all good stuff though. Director Jaume Collet-Serra has a pretty cool movie under his belt now.
B+/5
-Collin
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